Confessions volume 1

Folder:

hurt

This is a bunch of things iv needed to get off my chest for the last year haha some less exciting than others sorry!

I am bisexual.
I still cut myself.
From the time I was 3 to when I was 10 my dad let his friends touch me.
I REALLY don't like my mom or dad.
I think I have a crush on my best friend.
There's a guy around where I live who's 18 and me and him have messed around a few times.
I cheated on my Algabra 1 final (sorry Ham!)
I'm an amazing sketcher (I don't know if that's a word or not but shhh our lil secret right?)
I'm obsessed with black veil brides, pierce the veil, sleeping with sirens, and bring me the horizon.
I try to act like someone I'm not..
I have a weird twitch. I blink Alot.
I hate my life.
I'm a nerd! Iv read like 20 something books this summer!
I don't know if I wanna keep telling you things.
I'm running out of things to say so il just tell you some good lyrics for a while!
"YOUR NOT ALONE THERE IS MORE TO THIS I KNOOOOOWWW! YOU CAN MAKE IT OUT THERE IS MORE TO TELL"
(if you know what song that is I'm going to marry you!)
I don't think im pretty even though people keep telling me I am.
I wish I could dig a big hole and just lay in it and listen to music all my life.
I'm scared to grow up.
I don't want to end up like my mom a washed up 30 year old living with her mom with two kids and one who lives with her aunt.
Im scared of marrying someone like my dad who let's bad thing happen to his children and then deny it when their old enough to fight back and say that the baby led it on.
I'm afraid of storms and being alone.
I don't have a lot of female friends.
Sometimes I sit and think what it would be like if I was someone elses kid or maybe if I stood up for myself more and didn't please people.
I'm jealous of my once best friend Jill because of how self confident she is and how she dosnt let anyone tell her what to do.
Ive made myself throw up a few times..
I wish I could sing like REALLY sing you know?
I want to be a therapist.
Im an atheist.
My 16th birthday I'm getting "darlin youl be okay" tattoed on my back. (again if you know what song this is from I'm marrying you!)
I think snake bites are the sexiest thing on earth. Besides tattoos of corse.
I'm jail bait. At Warped tour I had like ten guys older than 20 ask for my number... I'm 14!
I really want to be able to be myself infront of people other than my family.
Im scared to get to close to people so I push them away.
Have I lost anybody yet? Probably so well if not I love you guys who are reading this still!!
I can't keep ahold of bobbie pins to save my life!
For a while I was considering dying my hair brown but decided I look good blonde.
I'm a closet stress eater. But I tend to eat Alot then feel fat ad throw it back up.
No body I know personally knows I like to write so I can post this and be safe. Hopefully. And if not well hi guys!!
I really hope no one judges me after readin this!
Well that's all for now...
I love you bye!!
Anybody who has questions email me at hchen99@ymail.com I'd love to chat with ya!