"I Feel Watched," she said.

     I want to be your Godly girl, obedient & pure,
& modest, Mama, no more wearing that old too small shirt~
I want to be respectful of you, & pleasing now to God,
           I want to know His will for me,
               & for Him, do each job~

         I know I haven't done the things
             you've often asked me to,
          & I argue when I need to just
             be willing, Mama, to do
      what you ask of me, because it really
                is never too much~
      It's just my sin, rebelling again,
             that hasn't obeyed !
             {& I hate it so much!}
    
      She pours her confessions so freely
           out throughout the days,
      the Holy Spirit's been convicting
           her of unrighteous ways,
    & it hasn't been what I've been saying,
         it's Him who's changing her!
   Reaching into her heart, & conscience,
           giving things a stir~

     So, Father, thank-you for answering
         years of prayers, & now
    I see I only needed to keep praying
      & You'd break through somehow~
       I have seen Your grace in her
         sinse You lent her to me~
      ~Now I see Your power upon her,
       saving her, setting her free!
                  *~*~*
                                ~By Anastazia Rowe~
                               Nov 6th, 2004. {3:33 am}
                          Dedicated to my precious blessing
                            who is beginning to love God
                            even more than she loves me!
                      {Just like I always prayed she would!}
                                                                                                                               
                                                                                            

Author's Notes/Comments: 

The writing of this poem took place after a week of rebelliousness & constant disobedience, & then, finally, one of our 'God-talks', as she has always called our spiritual conversations, & I saw her heart deeper than I ever had before...& stood back, in awe, at her openness, & her desire to live for Him, & not just herself, even as she was finally seeing the impossibility of being able to do this without the power of the Holy Spirit leading her through each day...as we all must eventually see, if our faith & relationship to Him is ever to truly grow, & deepen. She has been continually used to bring me back to the simplicity of child-like faith...& helps me let go of the ways we adults tend to make things so complicated! Like Jesus said, "If anyone would come to me, they must have the faith of a little child..."

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Nancy Louise's picture

I really like this poem. I believe she is a good girl. You have expressed this all very well.

anastazia's picture

hi mom!
I really liked your poem ''I feel watched, she said'' for me. i am really glad that you think that God is changing me. i hope that he is! your poem is beautifully written, and i love your comment that you put at the bottom of your poem.My favorite verse is the 3rd verse, I'm glad you see God working in my life! I can't wait until i post my own poems here, & then you can critique mine!
Love, your daughter, Hannah.