#anger #abuse #addiction #hurt #betrayal #lust# disappointment# life # heart # truth # suffering # sadness # pain # happiness # empty # mistakes # fate # time # difference # madness # theone # learninglove #dreams # poetry # longing #prison # chained

Abuse in a Child's Eyes

I was a deer stopped dead

in its tracks.

My head pounding;

butterfly swarms trying to push out my chest.

Though the spotlight shone on me,

I was alone.

Fear, panic, anxiety calling my name,

neither one explained the pain  -  I felt

when my mother lay on the torn couch

tears staining the black bags under her eyes.

Her wrist like a deformed mutant hand  -  broken.

The fist-formed bruises marked her arms like tattoos.

Her body screamed abuse.

The flaws are imprinted in my brain.

Searching the building I used to call home

a broken baby chair was thrown.

Scratches on the floor like the cuts on my arm

it wasn’t even me that he did the harm.

But he did leave me one scar

one I will have till the end.

My own father, whom I loved

wished I was dead.

Black Then Blue

Back pressed heavily against the door, breath rattling loudly in a trembling chest

You hear him on the other side

Nothing but two inches of wood separating you from another hospital visit

 

His speech is slurred

Vodka and hate heavy on his breath

 

You close your eyes

Head pointed up

You pray to the ceiling as the doorknob clicks and issues a final warning

 

Steel yourself and embrace the blows

Should tonight be your last

No matter what waits on the other side

It calls out sweet relief

 

You're already in hell

The Devil wears steel toed boots

and likes his coffee black