First poem that I've ever shared. I'd love any feedback

1 reply [Last post]
mikkiskittys's picture
Joined: 2015/02/05



Like forgiveness long delayed --

It was your thirst that awakened my essential need. 

Without permission, you parted my lips --

Your kiss converting my intended words to mist. 

With the first taste of delicious dread, I returned to nothing and everything. 

And a concrete heart reverted at once to malleable terracotta earth –

Reincarnating to its true nature within your embrace.


You -- hot and tranquil like smouldering wood.

At your unspoken request, the enlivened me arched in reply.

The instinctual desire to be set free to immerse in your blaze.


Hands and lips –flesh and breath –

Curves and twists and angles and inclines.

In a trance – in a frenzy –

Conceding to a native, visceral bliss. 


An acknowledged brief ecstasy …

Alive and breathing, it starves for air when forced or kept. 

Oh … just for a little while … set me free …

To ignite.



allets's picture
Joined: 2012/08/19
I Hope You Still Write

The imagery is divine, the internal world externalized sensitively and musically - swept away by lines written from the realm of the felt. - slc