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Frightened
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Pain As a little girl all I faintly remember is the fear that someone put there because they had violated me.
Because of this violation I withdres inside myself letting other parts of me deal with the pain and the terrorized feelings she held deep down inside.
This secret she keeps afraid and petrified that no one would believe her.
Startled at the thought that he would pay me a visit that night.
Hoping her mother would come to rescue here but she never does.
But when her sister is born she makes sure he never violates her.
Forgetting about the feelings of the first daughter, and the damage that has been done to her.
Never acknowlege what she knew about the violation that has terrorized her first daughter.
Not ever thinking the daughter would remember the horror of what her father had done to her.
Always keeping her at arms distances, making sure she is treated different from the other kids.
