How ironic [easier said than done]

Tossing, tunring

not sleeping right

Coughing burning

Smoking, not eating right

Not feeding myself, mentally, spiritually or otherwise

Not knowing right

Crying at nights my pillow is always wet

Because past people and faces I cannot forget

I have not discovered my purpose yet

Alone and lost in so much despair

I have family who talks about but is never actually there

They pressure me to be a "perfect" person

And at the impossibility of this I crumble into pieces

Each time trying to pick myself up and put back the pieces together

To then see if I can be a normal healthy person

But I always fail

The hopelessness comes in

The hopelessness resides in my heart

It seems me and the hoplessness shall never part

And how ironic the only way for the hopelessness to leave is for me to believe

And for me to hope again

Yes! how ironic

Easier said than done.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Involving the happenings of my life currently. hmmmm?

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