I just don't get how I can feel this way,
I know it's fucked up, but what can I say?
Those hidden faces suddenly start to show,
then it is realized that life's not such a rainbow.
Betrayel is the worse kind of torture;
but that doesn't stop it, so much pain to indure.
I miss the way we used to feel,
when you were there & things felt so unreal.
Those good memories we both shared,
& that feeling that you genuinely cared.
No one can truly care for me;
I'm a non-loveable person, can't you see?
I haven't shed these tears of pain in so long.
Evidently, as always, I did everything wrong.
Should have never thought it would last,
everything I love is taken away so fast.
I still seem to fucking care, I don't know why.
I'd rather stop feeling & just die.
Every god damn thing reminds me of you,
this is nothing new.
Then you have the balls to make me feel worse,
over & over... my heart just bursts.
I may seem tough... & I may be ugly,
but I have a heart. Just look at me!
Never trust anyone that will make you feel low,
that's the only dark, cold path you should go.
Being alone & numb is not that bad,
not at all when it's the only thing you've ever had.
You crushed my heart & sucked out all of the blood.
You did as much to kill me as you possibly could.
I wish I could just stop all these feelings,
that's the only way of ever truly healing.
There is no way of showing the love...
that I had & still do for you & everything above.
I just want you to fuck off;
but then again, it was my loss.
I was never meant to be happy,
I am meant to shut up & just be.
God dammit! I keep changing my feelings for you.
When I talk to you,
I want to say this all.
But then you just hit me again & down I fall.