Author Information
Narcissism
Hello. I am T******e and I love new things but I can't stand randomness. All in all, I am a modest, intelligent, and hypocritical human who is not enough human to be right on social and emotional levels. I am, very modestly stated, tired of it all. I follow the guidelines and break every rule. To be or to be not, it all ends the same. It's just a matter of when.
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But I do want to make a difference. And no, I do not want to make African children happy and well fed. I don't want to cure cancer. However, I want to support life, deification of the human race as an entirety, and knowledge. To know is to live a fluid hell instead of leaf an ignorant life in false heaven.
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To achieve my goal at the deification of the universe and spread of common knowledge and life, I made a short term goals to be the best human being ever, being superior in all forms possible to all other humans that have ever existed. From then, I shall teach the world the ways of mine to those who look up to me with either hope it envy. Either way, they will listen, I just hope I will not lose my life too early. Again, it's not a better of why or what or how. It's just when.
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So far, I am a supreme fencer, and it shows that I am a quick learner. This may go away as I grow older. So I must learn the most I can now, and use my later years, where I am more patient and wise, to teach the young. I am a talented musician. If there is a god(s), then he has some form of correlation with music. I am smart, let's hope that that does not go away with time. My memory kills me softly, it being so ineffective.
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I know my math, science, and I've got decent literature skills. My world history needs a bit of helphelp. And I would exceed and study for all of this, except that my 'school' has stupid red tape from which I cannot cross, I must balance my consumption of knowledge now (high school/college credits and failing classes and all that red tape) for the consumption of knowledge later (college, an advanced and more specific (and even more restraining) form of school). Again, tis but a question of when, not why nor how nor what.
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I have social retardation syndrome, I've diagnosed it myself. I cannot manipulate people as effectively as I would like, and I am almost desperate. There's love, and it not only directly affects me, but indirectly too; it distracts me from my purpose. And other, smaller factors are affecting me too, but they are too numerous and, individual, have virtually no effect. I should be strong, use my strengths of being a French in America. But I cannot get my social skill to a better level than I would like.
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I have a family of which I share much love. I cannot not. It has been condition, family is in me. It is a strength and a weakness, I must be wary. However, the love I have for them is underwhelming. I wish I could feel more for them, but I have no meaning, except for this and the short term goals leading up to it. It makes my love for them invaluable.
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My short term goals can mutate and then distract me from my ultimate goal, and I do recognize this weakness. However, I will persist, I am a green, one-eyed monster: I must be better than anyone to begin teaching everyone. Add this jealously plus the ecstasy of winning, and you have a perfect distraction, topped only by lust.
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Now you have met me. Who are you. When are you?
:(
It seems you've met the demons in my most recent ex ....
Much Love
Ashley
What do you mean by demons?
What do you mean by demons? My 'demon', as I can see it, is no demon. It is a force.
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I genuinly do not understand what you mean, would you mind elaborating?
post multa malae accidunt, bonae accidere potest.
it's a pretty common saying
demons are the things one battles with in life
Much Love
Ashley
i come in peace
Interesting stuff. The authors voice was
in fact mesmerizing and the imagery it portrayed
was so vivid, that it's hard to tell of its true origin.
Wow is all I can say.
Glad to see somebody spent
Glad to see somebody spent the time to read through it all! XD
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angways, that was as truthful about who I was, who I am, and who I will be, as I will ever get. That's why it's so mesmerizing and vivid, I think. It's because you can relate (either consciously or subconsciously) at some degree to my words. I also wrote many things with eitHer double meanings of poetic styles and whatnot, so that helped too.
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thanks for the read!
post multa malae accidunt, bonae accidere potest.
Basically, it's true origin
Basically, it's true origin is simply th truth.
post multa malae accidunt, bonae accidere potest.
Hello
I read this again, its probably the fourth time; and that's some powerful statements. Whether I agree or not is of non relevance. But I will say that can relate to some of it. This type of reading I love. So thank you. Its nice to meet you
I'm glad you had such a
I'm glad you had such a reaction.
post multa malae accidunt, bonae accidere potest.
You keep writing them. I will
You keep writing them. I will most definitely read them.
Take care .
Ditto :)
Ditto :)
post multa malae accidunt, bonae accidere potest.
Reply
"...I must be better than anyone..." Me too - it's a curse. When? born 1950. Where: on the edge of when death will happen. How? With great and trepetatious care. :D - Stella
I don't see it as a curse, it
I don't see it as a curse, it is one of The few things that keeps me going in the morning. However, that's not the point... did you reach your goal?
post multa malae accidunt, bonae accidere potest.
Goal Obtained!
dying gracefully
Thats good. Make sure to
Thats good. Make sure to leave no lose ends. "First reconcile your brother, and then offer your gift to the alter."
post multa malae accidunt, bonae accidere potest.