6 In Winters Silence

Slow melts the sea that in my heart sings through sadness

From out the sound of tears on rose petals the softest silk

The soul morns deeply the hunger of wills unfed

Thus I play this tune on strings of heart for sake of gladness

And pray one day of your love I drink as a babe on mother's milk.

Slow drives the snow of my soul as from the breath frozen in sky

In shadows through trees under moon and cloud lie

The sound my foot fallen in deep drifts as a single flake rings clear in my mind

In this cold place I strive to understand our place and why

And find reason to pause and listen to my screams out loud die.

Were you here by my side this winter land glad would be

But as my home now stands empty and void of you

I weep in the darkness for want of you

And tears from my eyes freeze to diamonds and shatter cold and free

And in his house now still to me you call if only he knew.

How long must I wait to my arms your want of me to hold?

In silence I watch from near and fare him abuse you, the gift,

That in time he shuns and forgets the rose your heart

And in his bed you hide when he is not there, cold,

In my arms in shadowed places under trees to me called out to lift.

No more this day shall I the forsaken knight be in your arms pray

But more the lord of all I perceive and hold close your heart new

That soon my home the fortress your refuge and safety will be

Come home to hearth the warmth my soul yours to stay

And in sleeping my arms held tight your flesh forget him that forsakes you.

And each vision of you in my eyes is like a rupture of bliss

One that brings out of me as the lava from the mouth of hell

A new layer and depth of being that cripples me each and every day

Leaving me in a fever of desire to be near you, have your kiss,

Only to collapse into ruin on your parting depleted and fell.

Now the question of what to do the two pains I see

To death on parting your touch to fall each day

Or the empty life my soul consumed with un-requited desire

Not seeing you this would bring and in ruin I would be

For now I chose my daily death on parting easiest to bear I say.

Long I stand and think on these wars of wills

How long must I wait till in your arms free am I. Thus I stand this penance

Knowing in your heart you desire only me and pain as well our parting days

And pray I do for the spring to come for our hearts with joy will fill

Thus on ramparts I stand and ponder well all this in winter's silence.

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