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Two knives, two knives 

I'll buy 'em

I need to buy myself two knives

Would give me, oh such a thrill

My wife, I wanna kill

Gotta get me two knives

My plan? I plan to stab her

I'll stick the knife into her chest 

I'm not a violent man

I won't stay silent, man

When I'm under arrest 

Reason? Wanna know the reason 

Why I wanna kill

My one and only spouse?

She is so very annoying 

I'll be overjoying 

Soon, won't see her 'round the house 

I know I'll be found guilty 

Of murder in the first degree 

They'll give me the electric chair 

But I don't even care

My wife's dead so whoopee!

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