Not Soon Forget

Folder: 
2018

She is

for better or worse

someone you will not soon forget.

She is trying to make me

someone like that too.

 

I stand in all her ways

I straighten my shoulders I cover my arms

I make my lips a muscle I know I can control

not like the mess the weeks after when I could still hear his footsteps under mine.

She makes me think in the good ways,

she keeps me from thinking the bad ways

it’s like I suddenly notice I have not thought about how much sleep I’m losing

any night I lie with her whispering.

 

When she asks a question I want to be able to answer without thinking

but thinking is not something I can leave by the roadside

especially when it comes to her

and as I walk by

she says

you thought I wouldn't notice that slaughterhouse inside your window.

You thought I wouldn’t notice how you were standing here with too many words

waiting to be pried open.

 

Oh, how I wish you wouldn’t notice.

 

How I wish I could make these memories only the past and not the present

but it is hard to pick up the pieces of yourself

and build them into something you never were.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Written 3/13/18

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