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A little girl I once was.

Innocence I once had.

Afterschool snacks,barbies, and cartoons,

were all that I knew...until you destroyed that.

Not knowing much then..

I let you use me and hurt me,

Innocence ripped sadly away.

All of a sudden im a 7 yr.old walking sex object to your eyes.

and undeveloped and fragile body,

exposed and touched for your pleasure,

things I never even knew about, all thrown my way at once.

Years past and it still goes on..

even at 11 grandpa had some fun.

Jesus was I a little girl with a big sign that said:

" Take me im free".

So I guess he thought, " why not"..

let me touch my granddaughter once..I can't resist

OK..so now im 13 and maybe a little smarter,

because you have stopped...

but who are these other men who have joined in?

Walking to the bus stop...naked I feel,

all these older men are staring and whistling,

some even talking dirty.

Does anyone care that im only 13?

Please just leave me alone..Please stop staring.

Down the halls at school I walk,

hands grabbing me in all directions..my butt my boobs..

by the time I get to class I am in tears.

So I guess that invisible sign I had on me all along,

only got bigger...because look who came along now..

my own brother.

Except he thought to test me first and just touch.

This time im smart...I told..

Why isn't everything better? Why am I being accuesed,

and yelled at...and the one apologizing..

I knew I shouldn't have..now they all think im bad.

Believing the next four years that I was wrong all along,

  I forgave him.

So why did he have to ruin it again?

he is just as sick as the other men.

So this time he decided," I'll screw her all the way"..

and since a victim I have been..I think the sign reads that too...all I do is lay there and give in...fights fail..

Im used, im molested, im raped, and a victim of sexual harrassment..Oh god I forgot, im a victim of incest now too..

It hasn't ended..I just can't remember the others..

My flesh, my virginity,

forcefully touched and taken away.

Whoever thought as a happy little girl,

I would end up this way?...

What am I now..what exactly is left????

I wish I knew..

because then maybe I wouldn't feel so dirty and worthless.

Without a doubt.. that I am!