On Alexander Pope's Mock-Epic Poem, The Dunciad; An Episode Of Literary History

Cibber and Theobald could not ascend the towering slope

of literary knowledge and of verbal quality:

and, envious haters---both---they spewed libellous perfidy

and personal abuse to an utmost, extreme degree

against that small man of high stature, Alexander Pope,

toward whom they bore a chasmic grudge of wretched jealousy

because, deformed himself, he could turn lines of perfectly

balanced and measure syllables, each ending with pure rhymes

(like Andrew Marvell wrote, or William Shakespeare, in their times);

setting a new example of great English poetry.

Without their help or consult, he had made his preparation

duting his youth---when he received a certain education.

To write as he did, they would have sold their souls to damnation

(but Satan did not place upon those souls much valuation).

They hated every word that Alexander Pope wrote, or had said;

because that vast accumulation always could remind

both of them that, among the books, they were sadly unread,

illiterate, incompetent, uncouth and unrefined.

I think what pissed them off the most, causing their rage to burn,

was that the Poet did not think that he needed to learn

one damn thing from their stumbles, that they had nothing to teach

him, as all literary knowledge was beyond the reach

of their mental---emotional---verbal capacities

(their brains could have hung signs out that announced large VACANCIES).

Talent, skill, sense---those two buffons did not possess one ounce

between them; smarter than them, both, was Pope's Mastiff bitch, Bounce.

Whom do we now remember with homage at Twickenham;

whom do we now regret as posers with an empty sham?

Whose poems are still taught in our colleges and higher schools

(here is a hint---it is not either one of those damned fools').

Who are remembered as the hangers-on of Pope's coat-tails?---

Cibber and Theobald, each one a dunce of epic fails.

But if you are asked formally (a test you need not cram

for) be aware that for their hatred, God does give a damn.

 

Starward 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

From January through March of 1978, my sophomore undergaduate year, I spent quite a bit of time in a study of Pope's mock epics, as well as several of his minor poems.  His short poem, "Elegy To The Memory Of An Unfortunate Lady"---about a suicide---is heartrending.

 

Have learned, early on, of Pope's great affection for Bounce (she provided him with several pups, she is buried beneath a marble monument on the grounds of his estate, Twickenham; just like Queen Victoria's spaniel, from her teen years, Dash), I felt compelled to work in an allusion (yes, dear Gawd, an allusion---what the scholars call an informed reference) to Bounce's canine knowledge of, and loyalty to, her owner, the Master Poet.  They tell me that, in public, Bounce could discern haters' hostility and reacted appropriately to it; and, on the grounds of Twickenham, a hater often ran the risk of being . . . bitten.

 

I apologize to for the last line---it is meant as a theological statement, not a profanity.

 

Charles Jervas' portrait of Alexander Pope, and Pope's girl friend, Martha Blount, is quite revelatory to the discerning eye:  I recommend to the reader a close view of the lower right corner.

 

Mr. Pope's poetry is not merely excellent as a literary example; it can also help with personal distresses, as I learned during that difficult time of my sophomore year.  I owe him this poem in grateful homage.

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