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Nocturnes: At The Executive Producer's Office Just Before The Premiere
"No pestilence had ever been so fatal, or so hideous."
---Edgar Allen Poe, Masque Of The Red Death
Give the audience what they want, I say,
and they will give what we want---subscription
fees and purchase of the advertisers'
products; a simple relationship that
has lasted since even prehistoric
pretechnological eras. And what
do they want? The best reality shows
we can produce. The numbers have proved it;
the random polls confirm the fact: across
the whole, interstellar connective, they
demand reality shows---and the more
gruesome, the better, most especially
if the primitive aliens are quite
ignorant of the causes and purpose
of their misfortune. Then our audience
will see how desperately these poor saps
join together---despite their collective
past of incoherent squabbles and bent
political motives. When unthreatened,
they threaten each other; only something
dire, from the outside, can unite them all.
I have seen the scenario repeat
itself on each reality show I
have executed---yes that is lingo
for executive produced. The planet
we have selected is blue; otherwise
useless to the Connective; and orbits
some unstrategic, minor yellow star.
The dominant species there do possess
intelligence of a most limited
accomplishment. And their technology
is laughably hampered by small defects
that cause large problems. Almost any of
their achievements is always delayed or
disrupted by the one consistent force
that eminates from and surrounds them all:
their arrogant, contrary arguments
most often caused by such little details.
They love to hate each other over these.
I think it most proceeds out of a mood,
an attitude, that they have---locally---
given the designation of sour grapes
(whatever that means). Ah, but very soon,
the entertainment portion of our work
will have commenced. The virus, lethalized
by our top laboratory will be
delivered by our undetected drones.
Genetically refined to be both
rapid in spread and deadly in effect
upon their bodies, what a panic, it
will bring upon them as it strides right through
their physical resistance and all of
the pharmaceuticals that they will try
to bring against it. This deck has been stacked
against the victims, and the audience,
aware of that, will be more intensely
captivated by all the dashed hopes and
the false promises their leaders will spout
forth like an unreliable storm drain
because they have so little else that they
can offer in successful leadership.
Our ratings numbers will soar far above
our previous high levels, and I see
enormous profit and some industry
awards for this, to which I gave the name---
The Word For Pestilence Will Be Red Death.
Cue up the monitors, and tune us in
to watch my latest, greatest idea.
So cheer the aliens on---that will not
help them. They will not last too very long.
Starward
