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Sleepless Nights
I lie awake late at night, deciding if the choices I’ve made were right.
I think about how it used to be,
how it was you and me.
We thought we had it all figured out,
we loved each other and that’s what this life was all about.
We thought this was our destiny,
that it would be just you and me.
Now I look back at that and think to myself, could we have stood the test of time if we tried?
I think of what we could be, I wish I had a what if machine and could just see.
I think of you most nights, I’m sure that I’m no longer in your sights.
I don’t know why thoughts of you keep me awake, I wonder if letting you go was a mistake.
I question whether you do this too, listen to music and think of what we used to do.
It’s these sleepless nights that scare me,the ones that leave me alone with my thoughts.
I over analyze, always criticize the choices I’ve made.
What else am I supposed to do when I’m lying here alone, no longer with you.
It’s these nights where I wish you were still here to hold me.
Whisper in my ear and tell me that you love me; those sweet nothing’s made my day.
Now I just lay here wide awake, confused so much to say.
I think about whether fate will bring us back together, or if that goodbye was meant to last forever.
Was I supposed to try and fight to get you back?
Was I supposed to grab your arm and pull you in when you said that your life was leaving on a different track?
Was I wrong to let you go?
Was I wrong when I told you that if that’s what you wanted I wouldn’t stop you because only you could know?
It’s these thoughts that haunt me,
not ghosts or demons or those alike.
It’s these feelings and thoughts about the past that keep me awake late at night.
I think about everything till my brain becomes tired.
The tears on my cheeks are just a bleak reminder that everything is over.
The empty space next to me, tends to get the best of me.
It leaves me an emotional mess,
keeping me up so I lay awake and think nonetheless.
