Suicide Prayer

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Dear God,

Why have you let these things be done to me?

I've loved you all my life

But now I'm not so sure.



Dear God,

Don't be angry at me for my questions

I'm only trying to find a peace I've been denied

Why have you denied me this peace?



There's so many questions left unanswered

There's so much pain left unexpressed

Everything just hides deep inside in the darkness

Where only chaos can reside.



I'm lost with nowhere left to run-

Nowhere left to hide

Life is attacking me from every side

Threatening to destroy me in their midst.



Dear God,

Do you love me anymore?

The world seems so much colder now

So I think you've taken your love away from me.



Dear God,

There's so many things you've left undone

Leaving my life all in shambles

Is this what you really want?



I'm reaching out my arms

Trying to grab hold of your arms, your legs, or your feet

Anything I can hold on to

So I won't fall down any farther.



Please take a hold of my hands

And life me from this painful place

I cannot climb out on my own

I need a helping hand.



Dear God,

Why have you forsaken me?

Through all the times I have cried for you

This is the one time I truly need you to answer me.



Dear God,

Forgive me for what I am about to do

For it may be the only sin of mine

That will send me into hell's cold grasp.



December 13, 2000

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Written about a friend of mine at a particularly low time in her life.....  At least she didn't go through with it...

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Kelly Mahoney's picture

Wow! This was amazing, I wish i could count all the times i've felt exactly what the poem said. It's good she didn't go through with it. It's great that you can write such a touching poem like that.