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My Name is Misery
My name is Misery
I can't look you in the eyes and act like nothing is wrong. I am ashamed, pissed off, enraged, and swallowed whole. I can't believe that time heels alland that forgiveness is all an option. Why should I face you, I do well hiding behind a fake smile and secret tears. I know who I am and that scares me, my name is Misery. My conscience does not exist and my soul is empty. I feed on your hate, it is complete Euphoria for me. I am the reason of your meloncholy behavior. To see you suffer and feel pain does fill me with the deepest regret, but I am numb. I know I should feel and care but when I look inside myself there is nothing to give. All that I have done has broken me. To keep the guilt out I must act on anger and hate. Why are you like this? Why do you do this you ask? Because my name is Misery. You look at me in the mirror as if we were two, but realize this, that I am only you. You are your own enemy and this hate is very true. Do you like the feeling of the anger that is rushing through you? You blame me for you poor choices and all the hell you have been through, you did this to yourself, to me. Now as you sit staring at me, as if I am a stranger who is familiar is some way. You know that I am your only friend, we will be together until the bitter end. Please don't forget who I am, my name is Misery.
Sorry If this Is To Long but I just got carried away :)
~For someone to forgive another person is a HUGE step.
Me personally, I don't choose to live my life holding on to regrets.
--- EVERYBODY makes mistakes... it's noticing that , what's done is done (mistake) and you have to learn from it .... and keep living life---
Living life knowing that you hurt someone deeply is a huge burden that most people have to carry...
BUT
People like yourself has that load taken off of them BECAUSE the person or peoples you hurt have choosen to forgive you.
Soooo consider that a blessing cause most people don't have that type of closer they need to get on with there lives.
I know, it's hard to COMPLETELY forgive yourself for you did BUT you have to have forgive yourself enough to continue to live and move on.
Cause it's not like we can go back in time and fix our mistakes and do things differently so, people have to learn not linger on to something that's already done. And yes, you have to live with choices you made ....it's your life.... That's what God gave us a CHOICE.
-- And some choices I can understand if someone is not self forigiving-- ( like murder...)
But anyways GREAT POEM !!! AND LIKE YOU I WRITE POEMS TO EXPRESS HOW I FEEL AND EVERYTHING :) - I haven't wrote any in awhile though-
Your post
You are right. I think that is what I am trying to learn how to do now is to forgive myself. I also know that I am afraid of taking two steps back if I forgive myself at the same. I appreciate your thoughts on this, it is very helpful seeing it from a different point of view. Thank you for taking the time to read my poem, I this will be a healthy step for me on forgiveness in myself.