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The Weekend
It was the weekend
When everyone was out
She planned her death
And hoped no one would find out
She had the house all to herself
And laid out all the tools
She wrote up a little note
She was no longer going to be a fool
She knew she was loved
But she just didn’t feel it
She knew the world would be better
Without all her petty shit in it
All her goals where unrealistic
And she was living in a dream
No one understood her
She lacked self-esteem
No one could save her
They shouldn’t have even tried
No one was there
All the nights she cried
All she wanted was a friend
Someone to hug away her fears
But it was her getting kleenex
To wipe away her tears
She tried many escapes
But nothing seemed right
And when she closed her eyes
She knew it was her final night
She popped the pills
Even though she knew it was wrong
She was hoping the pain would go away
And it wouldn’t take long
She drank until she was sick
And forcefully cut her arm
She saw what she was doing
So what was a little harm?
She finally set to work
On her ingenious plan
She said her final prayer
“Forgive me if you can”
She took a bunch of pills
Not even knowing what they were
And she started cutting
And getting rid of everything in her
She walked outside
And stared at the sky
“Why do you do this?
I really do try
I admit I need help
And I can’t do everything alone
I guess this is expected
I should have known
I am useless and stupid
I can’t do anything right
I do a lot of searching
But I cannot find the light”
She began to get tired
And knew the end was near
And for the first time
She began to care
What will happen when I am gone?
What will people think?
For someone like me
This is pretty low to sink
What about my sister
Will she be all right?
Who will teach her about life?
And tuck her in at night?
Will she blame herself
For the things I have done?
Will she turn out like me?
Will her pain become fun?
What happened to the carefree girl
That I used to be?
It seems my own worst enemy
Just happens to be me
What will my mom think?
What will she do?
Will she be broken-hearted?
And blame herself too?
What am I doing?
Am I really crazy?
Then she quit thinking
Because everything got hazy
She fell to the ground
And got real scared
Everything that was happening
Is what she always feared
She saw lights in the distance
And knew her parents would arrive
Too bad when they got there
She wouldn’t be alive
Her mom jumped out of the car
And surveyed the scene
She got hysterical
What did this mean?
Her baby girl
The one she gave birth to
Was lying there dying
And she didn’t know what to do
She couldn’t save her daughter
No one could
But if there was something
She really would
She looked up to God
The all powerful one
“What has happened?
What have I done?
This is my baby
My pride and joy
Why didn’t she value life?
Why did she think it was a toy?
I don’t understand
Why does this have to be?
I don’t know how to handle this
Why are you doing this to me?
Maybe I am selfish
But what did I do?
I wasn’t ready for this
I want her with me not you
She knew the time had come
And her baby girl was gone
She tried to walk away
But knew she could not go on
This story could be anyone
It could even be you
Or maybe your closest friend
Then what would you do?
So if you are depressed
And thinking of suicide
Talk to someone you trust
You have nothing to hide.
