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A 94 year old woman kicked my ass.

She beat the crap out of me and left me bleeding on the grass.

Every time I got up, she knocked me down again.

She beat me really hard and I sure as hell didn't win.

The fight started when she asked me to put out my cigar.

I told her that I'd shove it up her vagina and I guess I went too far.

When she got through beating me, I had lost most of my teeth.

Now people laugh at me and all I feel is grief.