Author Information
Top Well, Top Shelf
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DaddyO's BDSM by DaddyO
TOP WELL: DAMNED IF YOU DO
Top well and you run the risk of having your bottom fall for you in an unhealthy way due to her mind not being clear due to subspace. You can easily become labeled a conniving and manipulative predator.
TOP POORLY: DAMNED IF YOU DON'T
Top poorly and you run the risk of not giving enough aftercare, not reading her body language accurately, pushing boundaries or causing triggers you were unaware of. You can easily become labeled an uncaring jerk.
It takes a very special type of person to have been labeled BOTH!
LIKE ALCOHOL, BDSM IS EMOTIONAL
Emotions change during an S/M or bondage scene. Add in the element of D/s (control of said emotions) and you have a potentially lethal concoction of toxicity or one of the most delectable cocktails imaginable. Spirits are either high or in danger of non-existence! BDSM is done to mask, alter or change the course or intensity of our emotions. Emotions change dramatically during a BDSM scene just as emotions change dramatically during an intoxicating drinking binge.
LIKE ALCOHOL, BDSM IS INTOXICATING
After the high wears off, the person who experienced the high wants it back.
LIKE ALCOHOL, BDSM IS ADDICTING
Ether way the responsibility falls on both parties.
LIKE ALCOHOL, BDSM REQUIRES RESPONSIBILITY
The sub/bottom is the drinker.
She can be the irresponsible "alcoholic" or the "stately wine connoisseur" depending on many factors including genetics, social status, personality traits and temperaments.
BDSM along with the accompanying BDSM community is the booze and regulatory commission.
The liquor manufacturer (the "booze") has a responsibility to represent his product accordingly; use the specified ingredients, to not make false or misleading claims and to stay within the guidelines set forth by the regulatory board. To follow etiquette and protocols of SS&C or RACK (key word is the "c" word: consent) and to use common human kindness to not be in the practice of bootlegging (not to be confused with "bootblacking" which is an entirely different thing).
The Top/Dom is the neighborhood bartender.
The bartender has a responsibility to get his liquor license. To not over serve; to not take advantage or overcharge due to a drinker's drunkenness. But the bartender also gets to hear all of the sob stories, be your confidant and your release from a hard day's work by laying you down a stiff one (okay, the metaphors are really starting to get goofy).
100 PROOF
Bottom shelf. Bottom line: Decisions to engage in any sort of "adult" activities are shared. Responsibilities to do so in an appropriate manner are also shared. You are 100% responsible for your alcoholism just as the bartender who over-serves is 100% responsible for pouring you too much.
