"To the Devil Robot Bitch (A Letter)"

Folder: 
Letters & Speeches

by Jeph Johnson

 

I answered  several ads on the internet personals and only received four responses back that were real people.  Two other responses were from automated robots trying to get me to buy into a porn site to obtain the girl's elusive phone number.  Here was my reply back....

 

Dear Devil Robot Bitch,

 

You are really fucked to try to make monetary profit off of other people's loneliness. By the way, you did hear from me via email, but you are a robot, so the only way you can hear from me is if I brainlessly spend money to go to the "3rd" page of your adult website. Yeah, right! And you are so robotic that even though I said you were "fucked" you will probably still send me another "nice" email trying to get me to spend money to look at naked pictures of some woman that isn't even you. Like I am going to go to your website to find a phone number that costs me even more money to call, I am curious to see how you "justify" charging money once a poor lonely soul gets there. If you are a real person, when you are done bitching me out, please answer me that.

 

Real name:
Like it matters.....

Author's Notes/Comments: 

2002 

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James Brown's picture

Now this rocks!!!!!!
Well written.
Enjoyed.