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Lost in the tangle of roads,

The lines blur in my head.

Headlights illuminate the future,

While the red haze erases the past.



Driving further to my destruction,

Breaking myself down piece by piece.

The gray clouds overhead,

Hide the stars to guide me home.



Racing past the streets,

Houses,

People quietly sleeping the nights away.



Unsure of what he's been doing,

Unsure where he's going,

Only knows where he has been.



The empty void,

The black hole of this pit.

In so far,

It’s no longer possible to escape.



Tears fall down my face,

Hands tremble upon the wheel.

The body giving out,

Doesn’t know what he was thinking.



A stupid choice,

To try to fill the void of what’s not there.

Regret already fills his head,

Regret is all he ever knows.



Racing down the country streets,

Quiet roads,

Electrified by the speeding car.



Lost in his own backyard,

What did he do?

What was I thinking?



Stopping only at the quiet shore,

Feel the wind across his face,

The gentle caress of the ocean breeze.



The waves beat upon the sand,

While my fist beats upon the wall.



Bloody and broken,

Laying my hand down for one last fight,

One final night.



Laying in bed,

Staring at the ceiling.

Can't clear the mind,

Can't just fall asleep.



Never time to recharge,

Never time to just be.



Silence.

Just the fan spinning overhead,

The clock ticking on the wall,

Reminder of all the sleepless minutes.



Silently waiting,

Silently knowing;

That what I’m waiting for will never arrive.



Yet I’m always at the platform,

The same time each night,

And always leave disappointed.



Never the escape,

Never breaking free,

My past always finds me.



Thought I could change who I was.

But I’m always the same,

Always plain old me.



Drive them all away.



So I set out one last night,

One final flight.



One more gray skied night,

One more turn,

One more bridge,

One more breathe.



Yet can't bring myself to turn the wheel,

Escape the road.



Here I am one more night.

June 5th, 11:27pm

Writing to this computer.

Because no one is there to listen.

Here writing to no one,

Because the man I want doesn’t exists.



I'm here alone,

For one more night.



That’s all I know anymore

How to survive one more night.



Forget the mistakes of yesterday,

And make them again tomorrow.



So one more night.

Just me,

The fan,

The clock,

And my eyes upon the ceiling.



Memories play in my head,

What I had,

What I lost,

And what I gained.



But in the end,

No matter the lies,

Nothings different.



Escape in the car,

One more night.



So here I go,

Driving away from my hell.



The wind,

The stars,

And the moon.



Just me and the night.