Something so simple
Yet so complex
I wish I could understand
But we are not built for that
We are victims of our developed love
Our emotions can strike us down
As effortlessly as a single thought
My memories run wild
From one single smell
Or sight
Or touch
Or sound
Or taste
The real sense is pain
The feeling after the thought
Where I know things wont be how I need
To be content is a single day
One single moment
When I feel control at my hands
I strive to keep that power
But truly I regret what I’m not
My dreams carry me through my daily actions
My notions of a better future
My hopes that one day I will be the perfect man
Is that enough?
My tears well up from fear
But I don’t spill a drop
The moment I do is the moment I admit defeat
Can I have what I want?
Or will that consume me in another endless fight?
Is it fate?
Is it conscious decision?
Is it altruism?
Hedonism, randomness or blind fucking luck?
Will I know when I’m dead?