WOULD MY ASHES CRY OUT ...



Would my ashes cry out

in dismay

because you left this body

barren

and unloved?



Oh nَ …



My loneliness would turn

to placid dust:



Would silently become

rich soil -

feeding your lush

and healthy crops;

feeding your hunger

and your lust;

feeding mortality

and your decay ...



Until yَْ turned

to placid dust



United

at last …



Would this soil cry out

in dismay

because we left this earth

barren

and unloved?



Oh nَ …



This earth would turn

to bright

star-dust:





Transformed

at last …



A Love-light

lit

by Mercy

and by Trust

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Stardust to dust; dust to dust ... to star-dust ...

View myrataal's Full Portfolio
Turki Amer's picture

i like this most:

"This earth would turn
to bright
star-dust:

Transformed
at last …

A Love-light
lit
by Mercy
and by Trust"

Have a good time


Misty Lackey's picture

Wonderful writing you have here.

Vic Dewing's picture

Myra, ek het vanaand met vlinder-vlerk jou kom ontmoet. Hierdie skepping het spatsels goud op my gereën. Wat 'n heerlike avontuur om saam met jou van blom tot blom te vlieg.

Ernest Bevans's picture

Beauty is which what moves us to abandon ourselves
Spiritually is what moves us from ourseves to God.
You with the voice of a song bird
The mind of a philosopher
the pen of poet
John Donne would be proud as I am of you:

"IF I were but mere dust
and ashes I might speak
unto the Lord, for the
Lord's hand made me of
this dust, and the Lord's
hand shall re-collect
these ashes..."

- John Donne from 'DEVOTIONS UPON EMERGENT OCCASIONS'

Ernest Bevans's picture

Yes, Yes you me we are made of the
same fine stuff as stars! (-:

Eric Duerr's picture

If my comments inspired this, I am a genius HAHA. Very nice work, this is a great improvment on the poem as a whole, it's very very powerful now. Keep up the good work! Rock on~

myrataal's picture

Thank you for the advice. The change does look like an improvement ... I appreciate your insight. Looking forward to your return! Myra

Eric Duerr's picture

The only thing that hurts this poem in my opinion is the fact that it's justified in the CENTER...only certain works can pass off being so CENTERED and this isn't one of them...I would bring it back to the left and play with line breaks and such. have fun, you have a great use of language!