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10-18-04

3:33 am



Death may be knocking on my door.

I don't know if it is.

Becasue I refuse to find out.

So I put off the ct scan.

For another day.

Making up excuse after excuse.

Trying to avoid the ineveitable.

You see the thing in my head.

Makes me wonder.

Will I be around next year?

To have another birthday ignored?

Wouldn't that cook their goose?

To have blown me off this year.

And me not be here next.

It's hell when you question your life span.

And no one even cares enough.

To celebrate that you are here today.

So as my gift to myself I will.

Go and get the ct scan and find out.

If I will be around to be ignored next year.