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Pity
You wounded me, cut me, pierced me all the way to my very core.
The healing has already begun but still I’m fragile, tender, sore.
I know recovery, repair, rebuilding is something I simply must do.
What I don’t know – what I cannot yet see – is exactly how to get over you
My defenses were lowered, weapons discarded, I let my walls come down
Allowed myself to trust, believe, that a smile could replace this frown
I let you in way too far, much too deep, too fast, too soon
Now once again I sit alone, discarded here in my room
I crave an anger – a heat, a fire, something the pain can fuel;
I want a confrontation, a fight, a final battle, perhaps one last duel.
I need a way to bring you hurt more profound than you brought to me;
A torment, torture, unending, searing pain that will never set you free.
Except the desire to hurt you is something that exists outside of my grasp.
That righteous indignation I have is a fleeting feeling I seem to quickly pass.
I cannot hold onto the raw, seething hatred my mind tries to desire
Since at the end of the day what I truly seek is a plain, simple ceasefire.
I’m tired of the upheaval and scars our relationship left in my life.
I’ve grown weary of the fragmented dreams I have of becoming your little wife.
There’s no room in my spirit any longer for the chaos you seem to bring.
What’s needed is a new beginning – a fresh start, along the lines of spring.
I’m ready to plant the seeds of a new hope deep within my heart;
It’s time to find someone who can give me the freshness of a new start.
Now is the season of clean slates, renewal, rejoicing, maybe even joy
when I open myself to someone who values me for me, not as a toy.
My worth, my value, the price that’s been set of my heart and of my soul
are far greater than you could comprehend from the safety of your little hole.
You couldn’t grasp what I brought to you because of your own fear.
So alone you will remain yet again; by yourself year after year after year.
Go ahead and surround yourself with a bevy or stable of loose women;
For you failed to realize when you held in your palm a truly priceless gem.
You’ll have affairs, a tryst or two, relationships that come and go;
But forever more there is going to be an emptiness, a pit, a hollow.
You’ve lost the purest kind of love God ever could grace you with;
A love so profound many scholars have deemed it merely a tale – a myth.
But you had it and squandered it away because you couldn’t believe it true.
So instead of anger all I have left is a deep seeded pity for you.
