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A Grave
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Other Cloudy eyes, cloudy skys
I make my way through this world.
Colors are gone and I am confused again.
My face is blotchy from the tears I have shed.
I want to shed this life and live in another someday.
In another life with warm embraces, not blotchy faces.
This jewel holds no color now, and my persecuter does not see.
I do not see for there is dirt covering me.
I want to shed this life and live in another someday.
In another life with warm embraces, not blotchy faces.
I can relate to the sentiments that you express in this poem. Soul-reaching. Thank you. Love and best wishes,
Regis
this is good but I think it could have been better. Not that I should judge and not that you should take what I say as a judgement. I am not one to be critical of poetry. It is great if it conveys your feelings. I may not understand it the right way and by no means should you ever consider changing this poem, but I can't feel the full force of what you were feeling when you wrote this although I think I know the feeling that you were aiming for. I like memorize poems, so they are with me always. Renascence by Edna St. Vincent Milley is a very good poem that I think you should read.