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4-8-04 Comment on "My Immortal"
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Notes/comments I hope that you dont mind me using this space, but I just wanted to give you a written opinion on this poem you wrote. You have a good writing style, and you have good ideas written in this poem. You put it together really good, and it sounds good; however it would be so much better, in my opinion that is, if you used only your words.
The lines you wrote straight from your heart were awsome, and sound so original. I understand that you do like to use a line or so, every once in a while from another artists lyrics because it conveys what you feel the best at the time. But, let me tell from experience, over 2 years of it in fact, that the most perfect descriptions of what you feel will come straight from your heart, and will be in your own words. Take time to read just the lines you came up with together, and you will see what I mean. This is a good poem and it does say to me "you are in love with someone, but you are in blind denial."
Understand, that when the sun is out we can see no other stars...but at night we can see them all. Dont be blinded by the closest star, because the brightest star may be the one we hold in our arms everyday...
Dustin Wallace AKA The Legend
Senior 4-8-04
2nd semester
All I got to say for you Tyler, is that you have done the one thing I couldnt do...You found someone else, and you acted on how you felt. You are so much stronger now then I was then. You were actually able to see the other stars in the sky before it was too late. Me, I didn't you see. I waited until the star began to fade away, but it burned the brightest then. I could see in her eyes that she wanted the same thing I did. But it was too late...It's too late for me, I'm so glad it's not too late for you. I had to hurt so bad to learn those words that I gave to you on that fateful day in April about your poem. I never want you to go through what I've been through, so promise me you'll always keep your eyes open, and keep on smiling, because you never know who is falling in love with your smile. I had to hurt...no...I had to die to become a poet. I had to give everything up, I had to give her up. But she never gave up on me. that's why I'm here still. Because I love her, and she loves me. Some things are meant to be Tyler, but some things aren't meant to be... I was never meant to be. we were never meant to be. But you, you were always meant to be...Good luck to you,follow your heart, and you wont end up like me. Lost, and waiting for what was never meant to be...That, my friend, is the shadow of my soul. That is why I cry. My love makes poetry...so much more than that. Hopefully yours will too.