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razorblade tears

bleed away fear

make me appear

to be all the more near

to being ok and not feeling hurt

takes away the pain, blood stains on my shirt

releases the blood like the tears unreleased

i cut me open and i release the beast

the beast inside just waiting to come out

the beast that before i was without

but since i started it grew in size

and now its silken voice is the coveted prize

it makes me want to cut again

it is the silky lies i breath

it is the glitter from her face

it is the lies that i have lived

it is my life it lies within

this beast i cannot get it out

in my head it loves to shout

these thoughts of deeds that go undone

and once it starts i cannot stop it

it feeds on my hate it feeds on my fear

and the louder it gets the more that i loath

the very day i took the knife

and made a scratch to see if that helped

and sure enough it felt so good

it had me then but then it was small

only a baby monster and one that could be ignored

but this baby monster has grown into a demon

its shadow i cannot out run

it keeps up with me just a step ahead

and now i say this is not the way

but its to late for me now

the beast is in pursuit

it catches me and tears me up

and once its got me i cannot stop

this pain that i used to be in control of

is now yet another thing that i cannot grasp

its now another thing that i cant control