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Distance
She is deep. I am not.
She cares deeply about the world. She longs for knowledge and to understand the complex workings of this little hunk of rock that we call home. She wants to know everything and that fascinates me.
I am fragile. I know as much about this cruel world as i care to. Her thirst for knowledge fascinates me, as i switch off the news and protect my ignorant mind from it all.
She is patient and gentle when everything feels too much and the world seems overwhelming and i fear i am broken. She doesn't claim that she can heal me, but rather has faith that I can heal myself and promises to be there while I do it.
It scares me. Because I am alone. I have always enjoyed being alone. But now, the yearning in my bones scares me. It makes me feel small in this huge, cruel world. And yet, I wouldn't change it for anything.
I have learnt to hate the ocean. That strange dark deep unknown. It stretches out endlessly between us, only a few inches on in a map, but days and pounds and a lifetime away. I used to love the ocean, I want to love it again, but for now it is the enemy, the villain of our story, keeping me from her.
The longing, the tears, the strange new feeling of missing someone? I wouldnt change it for anything. Because she is mine. And I am hers. No matter the ocean between us.
