clouds are nothing but silent killers

i see them in the sky.



they just sit there and watch you,



they watch whatever happens to you



and you can do nothing about it.





you can see their dark hearts,



their souls.



you sometimes yell at them



without thinking,



without breathing.



then they cry



and you get soaked, you get cold



and you die, without thinking



without breathing.



clouds are nothing



but silent killers



clouds are nothing



but bruises in the sky,



they hurt



they throb



and they bleed, all in your head



and you can't do anything about it.

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Elijah White's picture

This poem is powerful, in my opinion. I appreciate how one-sided the power is with the clouds--as in, you can do nothing about the clouds and when you try you are punished; and the clouds have free reign to do what they will. And, the shift nearer the end, turning the clouds into something else, something in your head; the impersonal forces in your own life, or perhaps the people who are so important but are not aware of their importance--is good.

Anyway, I suppose this critique will not be very helpful as I have no good suggestions at this time. -)