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Fantastic Faultering
No matter what she tells me,
I know its my fault,
I know I'm the reason why everything is so bad.
I wish I could ignore it as much as
everyone else seems to do.
but its too hard,
too hard to forgive myself for it all.
For hurting her more than she hurt her.
Stealing away the one she loved,
I know my overprotective nature got
the best of me, and I drove her love away.
I see now that I can only do what I think is right,
and not whats right by others.
Its a fault,
one of my many, one of the few hurtful ones.
I try to ignore the hurt, but it gets to me too much,
just like i can be way too much for others.
Its my life, its my curse.
Why be so caring?
When all I can seem to do is fuck
everything up one way or another.
I can try to push it away, but I'll always
know its there, always blame myself.
I wish her tears would stop,
but they wont,
they will go into remission when I'm there,
but I know she is crying rivers when I'm not.
Hating me.
Despising me.
Wishing I would just go away.
