Stormed

moistened clouds conspired

blanketing moon half exposed

jealous of her show

 

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

For jan9thxciv

View ground's Full Portfolio
J-C4113D's picture

I am about to turn in for the

I am about to turn in for the night, but I just wanted to see this again, to make sure I was not dreaming about being mentioned in the author's comments.  What an honor, and to be mentioned in the author's comment to a poem in the form I have loved for decades.  Thank you a thousand times over.  If I cannot say more now, it is because I am so overwhelmed.


J-Called

Ground's picture

Rest easy

I am overjoyed by your comments. You make me feel like a real poet. As well, you inspire me. Thank you so much for that! :D 


© Ground

J-C4113D's picture

Wow, thank you so very much. 

Wow, thank you so very much.  This Haiku is really time-sensitive, also, because it swerves from the past to the present (from the first, to the second and third lines), with two backstories implies as well as the action going on right in front of us . . . and all of this is the exactly perfect syllable count, sventeen.  Wow.  This is how it is done successfully.  And there is not one glimpse of the poet's presence, which is an aspect of Haiku that many in the west cannot accomplish.   This poem is not only verbally beautiful, it is also---in my opinion---textbook perfect.  

 

 


J-Called

J-C4113D's picture

Well, thank you.  When I

Typo . . . I chose the wrong place to put this.  Sorry/


J-Called

Ground's picture

I'm giggling

Because your comment is awesome! Thank you so much! I really glad you like it And that "textbook perfect" part. That's cool since I'm still learning but don't look at textbooks. Thank you thank you!


© Ground

J-C4113D's picture

Well, thank you.  When I

Well, thank you.  When I wrote the comment I had in mine not just a statement of gratitude, but also some remarks about the perfection of this Haiku, so that others, who might be seeking an example, will choose this one . . . because, if I may say again, it has just textbook perfection and precision.  In my opinion, those three lines constitute one of the greatest Haikus ever posted on postpoems.  And if someone says to me, "Well, you haven't seen all the Haiku here." I would reply, "After seeing Ground's Haiku, I don't have to see any others."  This Haiku is one of the centerpieces of your entire gallery of poems here on postpoems, and it is one of the centerpieces of postpoems' huge collection of poetry as well.


J-Called