I'm. Not. Here.

Contrary to your belief, I am not here. You may be able to see me, hear me, feel me, breathe me, but I am gone. My body may be sitting right in front of you, but my soul has gone wandering. I'm not sure where to, or if it will ever be back. I might have said some things to you that you believe to be true, but they are all false. Lies are all I speak now. I won't call you back, no. I won't always be here tomorrow. Today, right now may be your last chance to tell me how you feel, to tell me that you do care. I'm slipping away. Further and further down the spiral.



Who will be there when I am dying?



No one will be.



I used to be surrounded by friends, and company. They all left. I don't believe anyone will ever stick around. Maybe for a few days, months, years. Eventually though, everyone leaves.



There is something in me that automatically pushes away all those I care for. I can't become attached, that is when bad happens.



My heart is in bad shape.



Its failing and broken, I dont why I put it out there anymore.



Time to play my last request.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

This was December 24,2008

View gothic_fairy_'s Full Portfolio