Sick of burying all the guilt inside
Ashamed of all the secrets I must hide
The tears and fears of all the pain
The scars through all the years caused in vain
Effortless and giving up
Wondering how can I go on
I am only perfect in weakness
and beautifully broken
Tainted and tattered shining through my eyes
Pain and all that is killing me is hidden by a painted on disguise
Scars go uncared for and unnoticed
They go untouched for days
Pretending to myself and to the world that I am okay
Maybe if I stay away from the harm then eventually I will
A week without my addiction and I am too weak
I give in, cannot take it, cannot shake it
A brand new set of scars to hide and cover
Another night unbearable, wishing the misery to all be over
Pile on top of that a whole bunch of guilt
Hide the pain with smiles, jokes and laughter
and stay away from the scars
It is a dangerous cycle that never ends
The pattern continues
Not sure where it begins
Trying to make it stop but I am useless
I am worthless and so undeserving
Cannot ask for help
I would rather die
Than wish for another soul to care
Just say that it is true,
that all thats left of me is an ugly shadow
Then I will say my goodbyes
and then I will pull the trigger