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Hopeless
I’ve gotten good at holding on
To all the wrong things
Grudges against you, against myself,
And the whole world too.
No wonder I feel so damn heavy,
I’m carrying a lot around
Almost all of it dead weight.
I hear others talk of letting go,
Accepting what is and isn’t
But my heart won’t let me
It chides me into remembering
All the things that have gone wrong.
I’m so hung up on the past
That the idea of the future
Is ridiculous.
People like me are victims of
Their own thoughts and desires.
We don’t believe we deserve
To be happy, or that someone
Else would be happy to have us.
I’ve forgotten what it feels like
To forgive or to be hopeful.
