the moment i WAS happy

I tried to be all nice and shit, but fuck it now lets kill it

I would've been ok left alone, but prick you made me reveal it

You come with your "honest" words telling me to "just do it"

Fuck it now and fuck you to muthafucka you blew it

I write this now with anger my heart heavy with sorrow

Get it off my chest tonight and we will be friends tomorrow

It'd be nice if I said I wish you happiness but I really don't

It'd be even nicer if i apoligized but fuck you bitch I wont

I gave you my all in all I tried to make you happy

But you didn't try at all instead you sent me packing

People told me time and again i was just being used

But your smile capatvated me and I took for kindness ur abuse

But ya know I think it's better this way us just being friends

Lets be honest as you always say every sunny day must end

But you known it felt good to think someone cared for me

Well obvously you didn't but my blind ass couldn't see

Those words made me feel better than i've ever felt in my life

"Oh I like you to" the lie you told on that unforgetful night

What the fuck was I thinking it couldnt have been love

I guess I was into thinking God had sent me sum one from above

Oh yea back to the frind thing hell yea that should work out

Im not mad its whats best for you my tears are now a drought

Oh the words at the beginning... yea I just needed to shout

Thats how I am pen and paper help me get it out

So all in all I gues we were never the right match

But that stuff about your friend is bullshit and thats a fact

Cuz my heart wont choose any one you were one of the lucky few

I wouldn't have done u like those other bitches if u only knew

Well I guess this is the end so I write sad and full of sorrow

But ist ok ill be fine cry tonight back friends tommorrow

I am stronger than this shit like this should make me fall

But i'd rather have you as a friend than not have you at all


But you taught me something in that short time I did learn

Mi Carazon will NEVER be given away again from now it will be


Author's Notes/Comments: 

Dec. 23, 2008

I wrote this after I broke up with my boyfriend of about a mont and a half now that may seem lame to some of you who have been in longer relationships, but he was my first relationship and also my best friend so that really hurt the anger and rejection and self esteme issues and resentment I thought was long gone crept back up on me and I need a healthy way of letting out those emotions with  out hurting myself or others so I worte, this was written in about a day or two as you can see how the poem switches from extremly pissed off and angry to be a little more sad and mello and that is because that is how I was feeling day one, but after a good nights rest the anger among other emotions had dissapeared, but the saddness remained, remember I had just lost my first boyfriend well first "official boyfrined" Oh, Well for those of you who want to know we are still frinds as the poem reads and I did have to fake a smile around him for about a mont or so, but all in all as i stated i'd rather have him as a frind than loose him completely you know any way I still sometimes hope that we will get back togeter, partially beacause I felt so good when I was with him, but I try to slap myself back into reality most of the time and say to myself girl you need to move on because he has, ya know, but sometimes it just seems like he hasnt moved on yet, but I think I should be sinceable and just realize that I'm not right for him and just tell myself that I need to go on with my life hopefully with him as a lifetime friend and us being each others support system! Well I hope if any one has read this far you enjoy this poem and tell me what you think

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