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The Main Attraction?
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2011 Never once in my life
Have I ever shared my man
Not with any other female, and now I am
Sitting here and rethinking my plan
He is all I ever needed
And all I wanted was him
Just to be near him I
Would have fulfilled every whim
But I find myself in a spot
He wanted her so I said go
Yet I find myself on a boat
With one paddle so I row
But now I am wondering
Just what for, he’s with her
And I’ve had a premonition
That says that he’s gonna stay with her
On a permanent basis
And he’s going to forget me
Now that this has happened
I sit and wonder why I couldn’t see
All of this before
Maybe it was because
I fell for him again
And I wanted it to be like it never was
Did he have to have her
Because of who I used to be
Or was it because his sexual
Appetite could not be sated by just me
I don’t really know
All I know is
I am not cut out for this
I want to be just his
And I know that even if
He says it will be my way,
That he will still be hers
There isn’t anything to make him stay
So I will try as hard as I can
To let him have his sideshow
So that I can be the main attraction
Once again, this is all I know
~Chrystal
Written on
September 20, 2011
I am listening to the song
I am listening to the song that you posted. Just so u all know, I am bisexual. I have always been, it started ten years ago. But she didn't want to have sex with me. I just figured on sharing him. Now this pain, I can take. At least I think so.
After all I have done to him, from before the accident... I was to say the least, horrible. I am not proud to ay this, but I even had sex for money. He knew about it and I'm thinking that is the whole reason behind this.
So there isnt too much I can say to him. Because as it says in the poem, I know that even if I say only me, he will continue to see her. Just like he's seeing me with out her knowing. I would rather have the 360 degree vision like I currently have.
That and my poetry has always been a release for my emotions. I have even put suicidal thoughts in my poems, because thats what I was feeling at the time. I have never, never attempted suicide. Nor have I put much thought into the whole killing myself thing. That is a cowards way out.
Nor have I cried to much. I tend to get angry rather than cry. I will take your head off and sh*t down ur throat rather than cry. That and I tend to put my anger in my poems. See, I see my poems as a safe place for all my emotions, it always has been.
Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time. I think I've forgotten this before. - Steven Wright
People like you are the reason people like me exsist. Out of a song of the same title by a band called 'Say Anything'