Lying in a cardboard box
memories, mementos.
A baby sleeper
a teether,
letters, booklets, poems,
little lap pads,
an ultrasound picture...
The items remain unused.
Some still sealed.
Never opened.
Frozen in time.
The tiny sleeper
became my crying towel
for a long time.
I held it close.
Slept with it.
Needed it.
Clung to it.
The letters and poems
go unread
save for me.
I am the only one
who reads the words
I wrote so many years ago.
The ultrasound.
My only visual proof.
My only picture.
Such a tiny form
lying still.
Already gone to Heaven
when that picture was taken.
Little face, little arms,
little legs.
Little child.
Never to have felt
Mommy's touch.
Several times a year
the box comes off
the closet shelf.
I sit in my eternal sorrow
taking out each item.
Re-reading, re-touching
remembering...
Fresh tears fall upon
the infant sleeper.
Mingling with the ones
that absorbed there
over the years.
A pain that's been there
since that day
still resides
and hurts afresh each time.
It will always remain...
The pain and anguish
of loosing a child.
The pain and anguish
you never get over.
The pain and anguish
of a box of memories.
A box of things
never used
never needed
but never forgotten...
2002
you're gonna make me cry over here, wow, I am so sorry for your loss. this was too deep...