The Joy of Farting

The Joy of Farting



We act as if it’s truly rare

To just lean back, and expel air



And then we ostracize the schmuck

Who dares to step upon a duck



We roll our eyes in shocked dismay

Whenever someone’s butt may bray



When truth be told, we all may pass

A little surreptitious gas



For debutant or an old geezer

Have all ripped a royal cheeser



We drop the rose and scurry on

And snicker when the frown is drawn



Yet who among us can declare

They’ve never passed some rancid air?



That house of glass still surely stands

For one whose derriere is bland



So put aside this false bravado

And stock yourself on avocado!



Eat broccoli and cauliflower

Beans and cabbage by the hour!



Drink your beer and carbonation

Vent your bowels throughout the nation!



Don’t hold it in and bear the pain!

Let methane fly and damn the shame!



Shout it strong and shout it loud!

I can FART and I am PROUD!



But if you feel there’s too much gas

Remember that this too will “pass”



© Bart Breen 7-17-2001

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Loosley based on Benjamin Franklin's essay ... "Fart Proudly!"

Poetry needs to be fun at times!

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Lauren Barrow's picture

I LOVED IT!! It was so funny...I've read some of your others and they're hilarious! Keep 'em coming!

Lauren

Sir Thomas Moore's picture

this poem is funny

Sir Thomas Moore's picture

that

Sir Thomas Moore 3rd's picture

Think

Queen Elizabeth's picture

HAHA!

Sir Thomas Moore 3rd's picture

I

John Wingfield's picture

cool poem i think that it was your son's website that led me here

it was worth it

lol

Paul Thompson's picture

hehe i wish all poetry was like this
keep em coming

Elizabeth Brigten's picture

ha that is funny !
you must have a lot of time on your hands

:)

Ryan Breen's picture

you disgust me