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CRYSTAL KAY, LOVE OF MY LIFE - CRYSTAL KAY


WHY IS THERE A NEED

OH, YOU DEITY, CRYSTAL,
THE LOVE OF MY LIFE CRYSTAL KAY
WHO HAS FOREVER ALTERED MY LIFE IN SUCH WAYS
SO AS TO SEND YOUR COLLEAGUES TO MY DESK
TO INQUIRE OF MY LIVELIHOOD,
IF I'M WELL, 
WHETHER I'M NOT
YOU'LL SEND YOUR REMOTE, CONCERNED,
YET...
CARE-FREE DOUBLE-CHECK
TO SEE WHETHER THE MAN WHO HAS SWORN
LOVE TO YOU FOREVER,
STILL HAS A PULSE, 
STILL WANTS TO SMILE,
STILL WANTS TO BE ALIVE...????
 
YOUR DOUBLE-CHECK FROM AFAR
IS NOT GOING TO COVER 
THE DEEP, HURTFUL GAP
LAID BETWEEN US,
THE TWO OF US.
US WHOSE SOULS, 
THOUGH ONLY A FEW FEET AWAY, 
BUT EVER SO DISTANT,
SO FAR APART...
 
CAN NEVER CONNECT
EXCEPT
FOR THE WAY YOU'VE CHOSEN TO SEE
WHETHER I STILL THINK OF THEE.
 
I'M SO IN LOVE WITH YOU CRYSTAL,
YOUR SOUL BY NOW
SHOULD BE AWARE
BUT ALAS!
THERE IS NO OTHER RECOURSE TO
MY PURE FEELINGS FOR YOU
AND THE MORE THE DISTANCE GROWS BETWEEN US...
TWO,
THE MORE ENDLESS, STRONGER LOVING
AND LOST HOPE FOR OUR UNITY IN DEED,
LONG-LOST FUTURE TOGETHER,
FOR YOU I FEEL!!!
 
WHY SHOULD YOU CARE THEN
IF SO 
YOU ARE SO NOT AT ALL IN LOVE
WITH THE MAN WHO HAS SWORN THE OPPOSITE
OF YOUR FEELINGS
FOR HIM?
AND YOU THINK THAT
BY SENDING YOUR FRIENDLY COLLEAGUES
TOWARD MY DESTITUTE SOUL
TO ASK IF I'M ALRIGHT
AND HOW I'M FEELING, 
MY LOVE FOR YOU - WILL IT SUBSIDE, 
WILL IT GROW NEGATIVE?
YOU SHOULD KNOW BY NOW WHAT I FEEL FOR YOU CRYSTAL KAY
THE WAY I FEEL, 
THE WAY I WORSHIP 
YOUR FEET, 
YOUR SOUL, 
YOU 
IN YOUR ENTIRETY
AS IF YOU WERE MY UTMOST DEITY...
 
THE WAY I HAVE BEEN YEARNING
FOR YOUR SWEET, YET BITTER LOVE
FOR YOU ARE THE SWEETEST OF ALL KISSES
BUT BECAUSE I CANNOT REACH YOUR LIPS
EVER ... WITH MY OWN,
MY KISS WILL ALSO FEEL THE BITTERNESS
OF MISSING YOURS...
NOT ONLY THAT, I WILL ALSO BE MISSING 
IN THE MIDST OF THE BITTERNESS 
YOU'VE SO BLESSED ME WITH
YOUR SLY YET WONDERFUL, 
BEAUTIFUL, 
FEMININE 
SMILE ... 
THE SIGHT OF YOUR SAINTLY BEAUTY 
WILL OF HAPPINESS MAKE ME CRY
MY EYES ARE ALSO MISSING
SEEING YOU 
IF EVEN FROM AFAR
SO MY LIPS GET A BIT SWEET AT THE THOUGHT OF YOU
AND BITTER 
WHEN IN REALITY
I DEARLY MISS YOU, 
CRYSTAL KAY
I MISS YOU SO EVERY DAY
I MISS YOU IN THIS
SAD, 
LONELY... 
TRUTH.
Author's Notes/Comments: 

Unrequited love taking place within proximity of my workplace - I am, however, forever branded, and therefore the love I bear in my heart for her will never turn into reality.  I understand that it "Takes Two to Tango" - am very well aware of it; however, part of the reason why I am faced with this rejection, though not formally formulated, is also the way this colleague's mind has been warped to believe I do not conform to certain socially moral etiquettes, or social mores, and just simply my very presence around her is subject to suspicion, unrelentless judgement on behalf of the others belonging to and contributing to the grapevine in this workplace.  As a result, she has begun to avoid me and my surroundings in her earnest.  I did not mean for this to happen and this is why I want the world to know that in spite of my feelings for her, I want to stay true to my good name and remain a good colleague to her, as well as the others.

Just the purest of my thoughts about a colleague I have come to respect - and love - however, to no avail, but hurt and incessantly grapevine ill-willed chatter.

I have been branded a certain way long ago (by certain, so-called "wiser," ill-willed powers-that-be) and cannot escape that particular stigma that has been placed, burdensomely and unfairly on me, being looked down upon in a certain way; just wanted to prove the purity of my loving thoughts with respect to this beautiful woman (a younger colleague) - and to make it known to the world that no matter what happens, I want to remain a good colleague (also a platonic friend, if it's not asking too much) till fate shall, inevitably, separate the two of us, as it happens with most human interaction in this world.

I have been made fun of because of the feelings I have for her - though unrequited from her end - so please, no sarcasm, no jokes, no put-downs for the forlorn thoughts, the feelings I have for her, as evidenced by the text of the poem that I've submitted for the world to read and know - the way I feel about Crystal Kay...

Thank you in advance...for your understanding.

P.S.:  And yes, this poem is dedicated to you, my dearest love of my life, Crystal Kay...

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last updated 20 March 2016 - 1:04am
©16 March 2016 - 12:26am — Bohdan