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I Finally Made It.
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Bern's Prose. I finally made it.
The throbbing of the ionic motors were humming away, a background music that somehow soothed; taking the loneliness away from a disgruntled Pilot. Why am I disgruntled, that is easy to explain? All is fully functional even the food automats one chose a number and a hot meal came from the machine. The food automat no mater what number I pressed only a bowl of warm Semolina came out of the slot. I pride myself and say to all that will hear it the following. “What man has made I can repair it.” I could of course easily solve this small problem by telling the main computer to fix the food spender but I am an obstinate fool and Semolina three times a day is not my idea of luxurious food.
The next sleeping pause I got down to the food automat. Taking off the covers I saw the problem immediately. It was a problem that should never have taken place. A mouse had found it’s way somehow on board the space ship. It was this mouse that had been electrocuted and my only being able to eat Semolina for nearly a week. I soon got things back in order and now I eat like a king.
Many will think that space travel is exciting, I am sorry to have to tell you that Pilot of a space ship is one of most boring occupations. Day after day one looks at the screens showing the space in front of one and the rear camera’s picking up the monotonous distance that I had now covered behind me.
All kinds of unnecessary programs to occupy one’s mind were on board. A complete course of study for every subject that man knows about is also provided. One can graduate to engineer, Doctor of medicine and any other title that interested one. The trouble is I am not interested in going through screens of knowledge being thrown at me by a stupid screen. If the makers of these courses of study had only used pretty young women to read the scripts it would have added a little spice to the programs but all I saw on the screen were elderly men many with white beards. Half of what they mumbled was lost either through being translated from one scientific language to another.
The ship was also equipped with the latest weapons and I have been known to fire a laser cannon at a passing comet just for the fun of seeing it break into very small pieces. Telling myself another comet that will not threaten the earth in the future. One great pleasure that I allowed myself was to write and send off details of all that happened in the course of my days duties The mouse in the food automat gave me a wonderful chance to write reams of my mending the automat and then photographing the mouse from all angles. I did not want anyone to say that I was not thorough in my report of how I inspected every nook and cranny in the space ship. My report gave me great satisfaction it would give someone a headache when they read through every small detail. With much pleasure I sent off my report dead on time. Six o’clock every evening I threw a switch and watched as the scanner read my report into the sending machine.
Going back to the screen I saw that another comet was on its way. This was too good and opportunity to play with the laser cannon once again. Carefully aiming at the huge chunk of ice and rock with no end of different mineral traces. I fired one two three salvos. The comet would in no way reach the earth all that was left was a gas cloud that I soon left behind by increasing the speed of the ionic motors.
Why did I become a pilot? Well I must admit the money. My clever Lawyer had a foolproof document that guaranteed me a million dollars for each month spent in space. The money would be paid into an account on my return to Earth. That is if I ever did make it back to my home planet. At he rate of increasing values my money depot should be sky high or in astronomical heights. I had to pass umpteen tests by well-known psychiatrists and also a University study behind me. I am of course a diplomas Engineer. If you are interested I believe they are still taking on Pilots. The risks are high and many do not return. Fifteen years have gone by and I am at last on the last legs of my journey I will land tomorrow morning. Perhaps you will see me as landings from outer space are broadcast through all channels of radio and television. Bern
