Author Information
no One Came To Stay.
Folder:
Bern's Prose.
No One Came To Stay.
It has been a terrible two weeks no one came to stay. I must admit from the beginning on he was a dammed nuisance. Don’t get me wrong normally I enjoy having visitors but this no one is and always will be a nuisance. One waste of time he has turned the whole routine upside down. Before all was well everything in its place I knew where everything was. No one will keep changing everything the soap is never in the cupboard where I put it after bringing it home from the shops. I could say the same about every thing that comes into the house. I put everything away in its own special place reserved just for that article. I always say there must be some form of order I once prided myself that I could always find anything that was needed. No hectic no running around opening umpteen draws and cupboards to find something. Then along comes no one and all goes to hell. Not a thing is in its right place; no one has brought all through the mangle. It is driving me up the wall. I shall be pleased when no one goes back to where he came from. My home would be much happier without his presence.
Oh! Dear my beloved cannot find the sugar and I know full well that I carried two kilo of the stuff home with me only yesterday. I help the wife to look for that blasted sugar. Where the hell did no one put the stuff? On no I finally found it You will never guess where no one put it. In the cleaning cupboard where all of the modern bottles of cleaners, soaps and other bottles of cleaning tools are kept. Now I am beginning to wonder did no one put it in there to upset the wife and me? Since no one has been in the house things have got worse. A once happy home is going to hell. I tell you no one is to blame and if I get my hands on this no one he will be very sorry. Things that go lost overnight, yes while we are asleep he no one is to blame when in the morning one cannot find that, that one put away so safely that it would not get lost. Other things such as the old brush that the wife put in the car to brush away the dust on the seats, No one has hidden that as well as a few other things, I would not mind but it is always me that gets the blame for all of these lost things. Now I ask you what would a grown man want with an old brush that has seen better days or all of the other small things that must wander off on their own. Not even no one would want many of the things that go missing. Sometimes when looking for something else one finds one of the things that no one has made vanish.
If you have a no one in your house take some advice from me Bern the Scribbler. Get rid of him he will upset your life, yes even your marriage if you do not throw that mysterious no one out of your home. Make sure that he or she is really gone. Then you will have what all homes want peace and quiet. Believe me you will not have it until you really get rid of no one. He is the world’s biggest nuisance and seems to be everywhere. I know I got rid of him many years ago.
