Mum really likes her Moggy.
The cats her pride and joy.
I swear to God it"s pampered,
much more than US her boys!
The cat it understands this,
and goes out of its way.
To suck up to my Mother,
at least ten times a day!
It really makes me jealous,
so much i gotta mention.
That cat gets on my wick.
Commanding Mums attention.
So i devised a plan,
to get a little pay back.
The best form of defence
is to go on the attack!
A family "DO" was coming.
It really made me think.
A chance for some revenge.
there"s gonna be some Drink!
The big night it arrived.
My plans were put in place.
I acted all polite,
angelic round the face.
The Party in full swing.
I borrowed Gordons Gin,
and poured it in cats bowl.
The one beside the bin.
I added the full cream.
The cat could not resist.
He lapped and lapped relapsed!
By now he was well pissed!
He threw up in the kitchen.
He threw up in the hall.
My plan was on its way,
he was heading for a fall!
I lifted Moggy up,
then opened up the door,
and promptly put him down,
upon the living room floor.
He staggered round about.
It really was a shame,
poor old Mr Moggy,
he was really out the game.
My Mothers jaw just dropped.
As Moggy took a pee,
in front of all the guests
atop the new settee.
Yes revenge is best served cold.
What else can i say.
Poor old Mr Moggy,
it just was not his day!
I said the first thing in my head.
I know it was a sin.
But i couldn"t help but say,
"Look what the cat drank in!"