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A New Year Resolution.



We sat around the table

my family and some friends.

To over eat and drink

because that is the trend.



Hot soup was served with croutons,

then pate with brown bread.

"Will you pull my cracker?"

My younger brother said.



The main course was the turkey,

my goodness it was good.

"Now remember and leave room

for Grandmas Christmas pudd".



Two hours to eat the meal.

It certainly was not quick,

and when it all was finished.

Good Lord did i feel sick.



Now come the early evening

the chocolates were unwrapped,

and like a sci/fi movie

the whole lot just got zapped!



I have to call a halt.

THATS IT! You hear me tut.

Before i start to look

like Jabba the big boy Hut!



Now New Years on its way.

There could be a solution.

I will do the same as you,

make a New Year Resolution.



The festive time is magic,

a time to over indulge.

But how you going to win

that battle of the bulge.



So on this New Years day

i suppose you just wont buy it.

For i have just decided

to go on a bloody DIET!



I will empty all the cupboards,

put the biscuits in bin bags.

Get the mind set ready

for cutting out the fags!



Yes a new me will be born.

The old one left to die.

Like a caterpillar

i will learn to fly!



I well may take up jogging,

join the swimming baths as well.

Going to give up heaven

for skinny malinky hell!



Then maybe join a gym,

depending on the fee.

I am going to get fit

and set my body free.



Dettox mind and body,

never mind the irritation.

Cleanse the body pure

with colon irrigation!



It is January third,

my God i feel so ill.

Two lengths of the pool

and i need a vitamin pill.



I have to have a coffee,

my brain it starts to nag.

My lungs are crying out

for the nicotine in a fag!



Yes i have fallen off the wagon,

my will power it did burst.

The alcohol is calling

"Let me quench your thirst".



Oh see us Human Beings,

what are we going to do.

I failed at the first hurdle,

exactly just like YOU!