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Love So Tangible
Folder:
collecting whirlwinds I've never felt love so tangibly,
Encircling my body like an aura.
I'll love you for all eternity.
Your subtle touch keeps me whole.
In twenty two years of my life,
A lifetime spent searching for you,
I've never met a man so sweet
Or felt a love so true.
I refuse to believe I met you
Less than two months ago.
Already I can't live without you
As if you've stolen my soul.
The love I feel for you
Dances along my skin.
It encircles my body
Like rings of smoke
And then scorches my heart.
The love I feel for you
Sculpts time as love sees fit.
All my life before you
Is eternity very ill-spent,
A lifetime hollow and unkempt.
:?
ex husbands... oh the things which can be said about ex-husbands...
Much Love
Ashley
i can see
that i've unintenionally opened a can of worms here.... lol
naaaaah
Pandora did that! you're just assembling the aftermath....
Much Love
Ashley
hahaha!!!!
good answer!!
Wow
You are a popular girl.
56 reads--- it's crazy
You put this out on my Anniversary.
KS
in this case,
i don't think it's me. i think "a love poem for an ex spouse" got everyone interested. i think it's a popular subject because a lot of people have something to contribute.
Overall I liked this poem.
Overall I liked this poem. There are some lovely images. The 4 line, 4 line, 4 line, then 5 line stanzas (with shorter lines) appear a little loose and irregular, but then again, that is the nature of free verse as it flows to the poet's own emotions. You use "encircling my body" in the first stanza, and then "encircles my body" in the fourth. This makes the repetition not contribute anything to the poem. Personally, I feel this poem (although good) has much greater potential, although I enjoyed it nonetheless. Thank you.
i' glad you pointed that out.
the repetition there was not intentional, in that case it was accidental (though i do employ intentional repetition in other poems, i also accidentally repeat words all the time, and usually i catch them when i edit). i wrote this 12 years ago, so it's too late to change it. i hope my poetry has improved since then!!! thanks for the insightful, thoughtful critique. the only way to improve is to recognize your mistakes.
2 months... figures lol,
2 months... figures lol, sounds like a twin flame union. Caused a lot of trouble I suspect! :) beautiful write.
Don't let any one shake your dream stars from your eyes, lest your soul Come away with them! -SS
"Well, it's love, but not as we know it."
yeah lol!!
i DO think he and i were soulmates... but not the twin flame kind. we were the "lets keep repeating this mistake in every life until we get it right" kind of soulmate. and i think we finally did, because based on how it ended, i think the only goal was to spend the time together without murdering eachother.
When ever it may be
I Love the way
You write.
KS
thanks :)
i like the poem, too. :) the ex husband..... not so much. ha ha :) its been long enough now that i can look back on it all and not hurt even a little.
Ode To My Ex
I'm just messin' with you
because it's been a long time since
you messed up and decided to stay,
but I made you go away and now
I feel less than nothing when I hear
your name.
.
Now here you are being seen, looking
like there is something for you over here.
Here? Ha!. Uh uh. Just keep steppin'
because you know I no longer
cringe when I think of you, which is rarely.
My heart is fine, thanks for asking.
We have a choice to make: either you
go now or I have to go now. Breathing
the same air that has passed through you
makes me nausious.
.
I do not miss you. In fact the pain I
lived with when you left no longer lives
here. I wish you as much harm as chance
can bring your way. May you die in agony.
Sincerely, your much happier Ex.
.
Stella L. Crews
10-24-15
556p
.
i love it!!!!
a perfect follow up poem!!! "may you die in agony." LOVE IT!!!
I'm Getting Over Writing Fatigue
venting helps - say it, then say it more, then just tell all - then deny it - ah to poet is to lie a lot. Gld u liked the reply poem, I felt the need to hang fire.
~(:D)- ~Stella~
.
well, get well soon!!!!
i hate to see you struggling, especially since you make writing look so effortless most of the time.