PostPoems Be Artistic. Be Creative. Be Inspired!

Ever wake up.
With no motivation.
No inspiration, just desperation.
You try to scream but the sound of your voice is asphyxiated.
The feeling where you wish you just never woke up.
Where nothing is ever good enough.
Withdrawing from your surroundings because you had enough.

Well This is me.

I feel my heart beat. Yet it feels a little off.
something is strangling it and trying to suffercate me.
I feel it griping me and as it feels like my hollow chest bleeds.
A slipknot lynch tied around my love muscle make every breathe a struggle.
day after day of a never ending battle.
some days its too much and I just cant move.
I feel so broken abandoned and used.
I see the nearest thing and wish to abuse.

This is how I grew up.
No love shown No love found.
Parents absent. everything absent all around.
Left in the dark abandoned in the night.
all I really know how to do is take flight
disappear and just go somewhere to die in peace.
But I am always found. something keeps me on the ground.
six attempts I keep breathing I gave up I am stuck being around.
well nothing comes easy blessed with brokenness
I am unstable as it gets. The poster portrait of insane.

This is passive anger.
subconscious rage. I just want to engage
destroy everything I know and stand amazed
at my ability to destroy rather than make something stay together.
My hands are covered in adhesive everything slips through my fingers.
Nothing comes back just the memory lingers.
Its a brash rash and exhausting road.
I am covered by tracks and scars from my previous battles
I am the creator of almost all of my conflicts.
to high of standards for everyone to live up to.
So I live forever disappointing in everything.
Ill punch walls until my hands are disfigured.
I now realize that all of My emotions are hairpin triggers.
stuck in constant struggle within my head.
beating down the walls of my mind.
pushing at my eye sockets until I go blind.
Is this the definition of "Not Alright"?