PostPoems Be Artistic. Be Creative. Be Inspired!

Your smile I see
when I close my eyes,
the happy facade fooled everyone but me.

When we met,
you seemed familiar,
but I knew you couldn't be.

I realize now, 6 years later,
that what was familiar in you was me.

Your pain screamed out to me,
your eyes haunt me even now.

I never talk about you,
forgive me for that.

I barely knew you as a person,
but I felt a kinship,
a bond I've never understood.

You looked through me,
saw my suicidal thoughts,
all the ones I tried so hard
to hide from the world.

I felt your pain,
I could've helped you.

I could've said I feel the same way,
that each day I wake,
wishing I hadn't.

But I ran from my emotions,
ran from you.

I could've understood you,
but I was too afraid to let you in.

Now your death is on my hands,
I'm guilty because I did nothing.

I can feel the noose,
can see in my head as you swung from it,
finally free of your pain.

I'm not the one who killed you,
not by my own hands,
but by my ignorance, my fear.

I let you die,
when I could've saved you,
I turned my back.

Forgive me for leaving you
in the darkness alone,
I could have guided you.

I hear you call to me,
hear you whisper when the blade caresses my skin.

"Come join me, my kindred spirit,
live in freedom with me,
what do you have that keeps you alive?"

Are you in Heaven or Hell?
I miss you Joey,
and I plead for your forgiveness.

I try to help those in pain,
no longer ignoring their cries of help.

I'll atone for my sin,
for failing you, for killing you.

Wherever I go,
be it Heaven or Hell,
I will always be
branded with my sin,
I'll always be your murderer.