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Caught Between
By Taylor Springs
October 7, 2012

Her pain exists without reason
No pattern to her mood
Her tears fall without asking
And she feels completely doomed

She is stuck between worlds
Between light and dark
Trapped between night and day
And coexisting without happiness

In her world, there is no wrong or right
There is no up or down
No place to run to
Empty, dull, and black
Is the way she’s learned to live

Black as the cursed kitten
Black as those before her
Dark as the night sky

She wasn’t built for the world she’s in
She’s too fragile for this
She is caught between the good and bad
And only feels emptiness

Nobody hears
Her screams
Her sobs
Her begging for help

“There must be a light on the other side,”
She cries out to her nobody
“There must be a way to be like them.”

Banging her fists and wiping her eyes
She defines the words, “I tried.”
She gave everything the cruel, dark world gave her
An attempt at life, her heart and breath
She screams
“You can have it all back,
I was not built for this”

Reaching to the lightest corners of her black soul
Pulling out questions
Begging for a new start
A way to end herself and still survive

Each day seems darker than the last
Every breath is harder for her to take

This girl is
empty,
broken,
alone
a neglected mind
body
and soul

Her happiness is gone,
She bleeds out her pain, in between sobs

Is there a way to let go using pure willpower?
Is there a way to leave without saying goodbye?

In between the trees there is a whisper, calling her home
But farther off in the distance is where she’ll probably go

There’s a broken smile, and a frozen tear
But the pain seems to be lighter now
She is empty of fear

Her soul whispers and she lets it go
Up and up and far away
Never to return again
This girl was never meant to stay

So she smiles that weak smile
Her broken and tentative smile
And takes her heart from her chest
She nods and shakes
“I tried my very best”
Then the world crashes down
Around her dark place

She’s still smiling

Falling to the ground,
The pieces of her body
Concave within themselves

All her terrible feelings evaporate
As she fades from black
to gray