PostPoems Be Artistic. Be Creative. Be Inspired!

Hello?

I'm calling in sick today

You see, I have this holy disease

Um, the stigmata's the name.

I know it's hard to believe, even for me!

I wasn't even that great of christen

I mean, I swear and I steal

I don't break bread with every meal

And I haven't even glanced at a Bible in years

But I guess that's just part of god's big plan

I really don't know.

But I can't come into work today

And yes, I realize I'm calling in a little late

But you see, it's hard to hold the phone

With these holes in my hands

And the sword in my side

And it's kinda hard to see

With all this blood in my eyes.

I can see if I can make it in

But it's really hard to walk

With these nails in my feet.

Are you sure Sharon can't come in?

And Susan, she has that venereal disease

And Thomas he never really liked me

So I know he wouldn't come in anyway.

I'm sorry, but I guess you'll just have to make due without me

For the next, oh, three days.

Okay, thank you.

Oh, and never believe the stigmata doesn't sting.